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I realize that my life has been a little...well...nuts lately.
Jeff is in between jobs, we're searching for direction and the fast paced day to day craziness never seems to slow down, especially lately.
The other day I realized I was treating God like a toy. I would put Him back in the box when I was done talking or praying, and then continue on my day. I haven't been disciplined to stay in the Word. I talk to Him, but only when it's conveniant for me. Like a toy. When I want to talk to Him, I bring him out of the box. When I'm ready to listen, or read scripture, I take Him out of the box. When I get busy? Back in the box He goes.
Wow, what an insult to the Master of the Universe, Creator of the Heavens and the Earth!! I am so glad He doesn't put me in a box telling me He'll get to me when it's conveniant.
God doesn't belong in any box. We often say "Don't put God in a box" meaning don't limit what you think you know about God...He can do more than what we could ever imagine.
But adding to that familiar phrase, let's not put God in a box and neglect the most important relationship we could ever have. Let's not forget He desires an intimacy that can only be attainedy by acknowledging constantly that He is there beside us and sent His Holy Spirit to be within us.
And THE most important thing we could do EVERY day is talk to Him. Walk with Him as He walked in the gardens in the beginning with Adam. |
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How do we know that someone's intentions were bad? Did a car really cut us off or were they just not paying attention?
Carrie came home from preschool talking about a boy who, in her view, wasn't very nice to her. After hearing the story, it occurred to me that perhaps the boy didn't realize he was being mean. Did she communicate that it hurt her feelings or that she wanted to play ball and they weren't playing with her?
"Carrie, I'm not sure (so and so) meant to be mean. If you didn't say anything, he probably didn't even realize you had your feelings hurt."
I was hoping that this would lighten her mood and she'd brush it off, forget about it and move on.
Then, as soon as that came out my mouth, I realized that I had to take my own medicine.
I have a habit of later disecting a situation from the past and perhaps looking at it through a skewed lense.
A discussion can seem like an argument, an innocent look my way can seem like a stare...when the original intention was never supposed to be negative. And Satan knows this and he uses it against me. And it eats inside me to where it is so difficult to find peace sometimes.
And so, in that moment, I realized that I needed to step back and not personalize everything. Let things bounce off my shoulders.
I think it safe to assume that most of the time, when I feel offended by something or someone, whatever was said or whatever the action - it was never meant to be offensive in the first place. |
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With Jeff seeking what God's new chapter in life and work would be for him, I find myself back to the place where I have to live my life trusting in Him on a daily basis.
Not knowing what the future brings can have quite a spiritual impact on me. You might say it builds character. But not just any character. It's building in me the dependence on my Heavenly Father and building a Christ-like character in me.
Now that makes me sound saintly, doesn't it?
Oh I'm far from perfect, and I'm far from being the spitting image of my Savior. I like to plan, I'm a list-maker. Unfortunately, I entertain the "worst case scenarios" ... I guess I do this in order to prepare myself for what could happen? And that can lead to worry and that takes me away, takes my trust away from where it is designed to be...in His hands. And there are many days when I flip flop like a fish out of water.
"It's going to be okay"
"But what if ..."
"God knows exactly where we are, He's been here, and He's already where we'll be tomorrow"
"What if we have to move?"
"I'd like to move, but what would that mean for family left behind?"
And so in this season of not knowing, God is building my character by demanding my trust, and commanding my ways...and I can't see where the next step is...
like walking blindfold, I have no idea what to expect next- but I know who is leading me, and even if I have to countless times return to the point of trust, I know who holds tomorrow and I know who holds my hands.
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I was at Wal-mart today and was chatting with a woman who knew Walter from school. We talked about the importance of Christian teachers.
We were talking about the faith of a child, and how when we grow up to adults, we often take the Word in an egocentric manner.
We grown ups often read, hear the Word of God and immediately start thinking of ...ourselves.
What does the Gospel say for me?
How do this apply to me, how can I apply this to my life? (which are good questions)
What has God done for me? What will God do for me?
How can God heal me? and on and on
I find Walter and Carrie asking different questions.
Who is God?
Does God still love the devil? (Oh yes, Walter asked me that when he was five!)
Does God get mad?
They want to know more about who God is.
What does He look like? What is heaven like?
I look around at creation and see God - the trees, the sunset, the wings of a butterfly...but I don't always go to the Word to see who He is.
I read the Word and try to learn something, but I don't always go seeking to find out who He is.
One day years ago, I started going through Psalms and I underlined any word that God was. I may need to go back to that and remind myself of who God is, and in that may I find myself in awe of this amazingly BIG God who is everywhere, everywhere in a spacial sense and everywhere in a time sense. And may it humble me that this God of wonder and majestic above the wisest and most powerful of kings...chooses to have me as his daughter and heir to the throne. |
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Thought I'd share my newest work with my blog friends...
the web page for the (rough) recorded version is at the bottom...
Soli Deo Gloria (2x)
In Everything under the sun
Glory to God alone
In Everything in Heaven's Realm
Glory to God alone
Our hands lifted high
our palms open wide
His (Your) anthem that we bring
Only to you our King
http://www.tnjohnsons.com/mod/podcast/file_site.php?file_id=14 |
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God was, God is, and God will always be.
God was. The God we serve today is the same God who spoke to Moses, the same God who tenderly breathed life into Adam.
But is that what it means when we say "God was?"
I think it means just that...He is the God of Moses and Adam and everything and everyone that has lived in the past. And we serve that very same God. But also I think it can mean so much more.
God's reign spans over yesterday, today and tomorrow. God reigned, past tense, over yesterday, true. But He still reigns over yesterday. Present tense, still reigning over what already happened. The sins we have committed, have been paid for. We do not have to pay for them if we believe in His ultimate sacrifice, sending His only son Jesus Christ to pay for them. And God knows the sins we will commit tomorrow. And they have already been paid for! Praise the Lord they have already been paid for!
I think it allows us to view the past and what has happened in a victorious light and to understand that time is not to God what it is to us. That He can still reign over something that has happened is almost impossible to understand. And that is the beauty behind the so many mysterious of God. And helps us understand that He reigns over today because He's already been here. He's omnipotent in that He's everywhere, but He's also everywhere in the concept of time. Reigning over the very beginning of "time" and the very end of "time."
And that gives me a sense of peace that cannot be shaken
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."
Jeremiah 29:11 and 12
Come, let us seek the One who already knows. |
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I make mistakes. You make mistakes. We all make mistakes.
What I allow myself to do is create a level of perfection in my own personal expectations and when I make a mistake, I don't allow myself to embrace the grace from the one true perfection. I sit on the mistake, I recreate the situation in my head and let it eat at me until it drives me bonkers.
Why can't I just let go? Because for that moment(s) I am forgetting that not one person on this earth can reach perfection. Nobody. And when our pride gets in the way and we fool ourselves into thinking that we're pretty good, or we're not as much in need of grace and mercy as others...well, that's when we're wrong. Dead wrong.
And perhaps realizing that perfection is out of reach for any one person, perhaps that should motivate us to dish out grace, mercy, forgiveness, compassion, kindness and understanding for someone else when they make a mistake. Even when they don't realize it.
Only the Perfect One is perfect. Jesus Christ was the only person who could walk each day of life in absolute perfection. And He gives perfect grace, perfect mercy, perfect forgiveness. And perfect love. |
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We, the extended Johnson families- just spent the week in Panama City. We stayed at the Marriott Bay Point resort and had a great time.
The Johnson ladies decided on a morning of pampering that turned into an entire day's event. Their Serenity Spa was amazing. We started our day Wednesday with a trip to the spa, and decided after a short break to their hotel restaurant to return to the spa for more pampering.
We started with a mixture of hot tub, steam room, sauna and then moved on to massages. Aubrey was assigned to me. She was very good and even gave me some pointers when I explained that I'd really like to help my husband with his neck problems.
We had mimosas, Amy and Judy (aka- Mom) had pedicures and Amy topped off her day with a haircut and style.
The Johnson family used the public beach, St. Andrews state park. The sand was the softest I have ever felt. The water was a warm 86 degrees and the waves were gentle enough for a few days. We had enough time to get some usage out of the new boogie boards we just purchased at Alvin's, a touristy place to shop along the beach.
Then the hurricane Alex threatened our vacation. We watched as the weatherman showed us possible paths. It went west to Texas, but the beaches were still affected. The waves were big, the rip current was strong and a double red flag meant only ankle deep wading along the beaches was allowed. However, they had a nice lagoon beach and it was a lovely place to go to snorkel and even play in some baby waves. Three rays swam past us and it was amazing how one ray flipped up it's (fin?) and it looked like a shark. Scared Rachel, the almost teenager in our group.
The adults volunteered to watch our kids and Jeff and I had a date night. We had not yet celebrated our ten year anniversary (June 17.) So we decided on Sharkies, a fabulous restaurant on the beach in Panama City. The Oysters were fantastic and it was a fun evening.
So I think Panama City is a great place to visit, especially if you can find a place not so near the tall hotel towers, a little quieter area for some family fun.
And the summertime is great because the place is not swarming with spring breakers.
That is a party atmosphere I prefer to stay away from.
And staying in a hotel suite with two bedrooms gave this extended family of 11 some tight but cozy time together. It was great. I would do it again in a heartbeat.
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My son is a bright child. He is not always motivated to do math drills or practice reading. He loves games.
So, I created a math game with playing cards.
I took out all cards except 2-10.
Then I created a box of squares with numbers 4-20 on each square.
Each player starts with one card. For every turn, they draw 2 cards.
They then select two cards to add together (leaving the third card in their hand) and find the sum on the chart.
They then discard those two cards they use to find the particular sum. The player then marks off that number on the chart.
For example, if Walter starts with a 2, and draws a 7 and a 3...he can select two of the three cards to use. He may choose to use 2 and 7 to make the sum of 9. He then marks off the 9 on the chart and discards the 2 and 7.
The player who marks off every number on their chart wins. (A number, (sum) can only be used once.)
If a player draws two cards and is unable to play (every combination of two cards has a sum that has already been used) they lose a turn and continues to draw two cards on their next turn.
There is strategy, you may want to hold the 2's, because there is only one way to count to 4 with these cards (2 + 2 ) but there are many ways to count to 10.
It is a great game for Walter, our 6 year old, because he can practice his adding skills.
It is a great game for Carrie because she can practice recognizing written numbers as well as counting.
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My neighborhood has a sign that says "No Solicitation" and usually I remind people when they come to my door trying to sell something. I am usually polite, but quick to say "no thank you" and shut the door.
This time was different.
I just had 50 some high school and college aged students over at my house Sunday night for a graduation party. When the doorbell rang Monday at noon, I wasn't in the mindset that it was a solicitor.
He was very slick. He was college aged and looked clean. He said it was "meet your neighbors day" and that he lived on the street near the entrance of our subdivision. He could name the street and say where the house was that he lived. He said he was on a baseball team that won regionals and they were going to Hawaii and he was earning his way doing a fundraiser. He said they were selling baskets of books with Vanderbilt and they would go to children who needed them. He said his parents didn't want him to take advantage of his neighbors, so he would work it off. He said his dad owned a window washing company and gutter cleaning company. I let him in and showed him on the deck where my worst problem was. He said he could get it. I also told him that I thought I needed help cooking for victims of the Nashville flood June 4. He said he could get his girlfriend, Christina to help with that. He seemed so nice.
Scam. I wrote a check made out to QSI and after he left I did a google search. Same story.
http://www.ripoffreport.com/Search/qsi.aspx
I called the bank and stopped/canceled the check.
I called the police and filed a report.
I have very little tolerance for lies...especially when they are ones where people prey on the kind and generous people.
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I am going through Carrie's bag of artwork that we got to take home after her preschool Family Night. There are beautiful brightly colored butterflies that I can't help but to want to tape on some of my windows. There are pictures where she can clearly explain who is who and what they are doing. What do I do with them? How can I tuck them away in a drawer?
I look around my kitchen and dining room and see the wonderful display from her creative hand and wonder what my house would look like if I wanted what we call a "Museum House."
There was a time when my house was clean and orderly. There was a time when everything was neatly put in its place. I laugh to myself because that was a time when my husband wasn't even home. He was on the road as a consultant. I saw him on the weekends. We lived on the weekends, so it wasn't exactly the cleanest house. And by Monday evening everything was put back in its place. A clean, orderly house. A quiet house. A lonely house. It was close to the "Museum House," although we were newlyweds so we had not yet had the chance to purchase "Museum House" furniture.
At this very moment, there is a dollhouse -still waiting for final decoration- in front of the fireplace. There is at least one load of laundry on my couch waiting to be folded. There are puzzles on the bottom shelf of the endtable in the living room. A dog bed beside the window by the front door...because I know how much Sampson loves to be on the lookout.
My dining room table now has papers spilling over that the kids have worked on...pouring their creativity into "gifts" for their parents...and water spills where the watercolor paint got a bit messy. Where do blankets go...you know...the ones you cuddle up with when you're watching a movie? I don't have a "place" for them...the closet is already taken with the basket of shoes and basket of musical instruments.
And so my house is not a "Museum House." Far from it. But this is a house where laughter is heard, where smiles are abundant, where memories are made. My house is far from clean 90% of the time when we have people over...for whatever the reason. We have board meetings here, we have parties here...we have spontaneous-no reason- get togethers here. And no one seems to mind that there's a dollhouse in front of the fireplace. No one seems to mind my butterflies on the window.
Will people remember the incredibly clean house? Nope. But they will remember the Johnson house as being one of the most fun places to be at. Where life is lived and lived well.
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Well, it's been a while since my last blog.
Many things have happened to the Johnson Family.
First, I completed two back to back races...something I was a little nervous about accomplishing.
I ran the Country Music Half Marathon here in Nashville. It was 13.1 miles.
I ran it with my good friend, Jill. She is amazing. She finished...in pain. But she finished. I am so proud of her.
My big brother, Brad and I have always had the dream of running a marathon together.
He ran one in medical school and I ran one three years ago.
So together, we ran the Cincinnati Flying Pig Marathon (26.2 miles) the following weekend after my half marathon. My knee hurt, but slapping Icy Hot on my knee, prayer and the determination (stubbornness) I get from my father helped me cross that finish line with my brother, my rock. And just a sidenote- I am never using runner's "Goo" again...yuck. My stomach will never let me forget it...and 10 porta potties from mile 13-26 will slow your time down...for sure. But we still finished in 5 hours and 2 minutes. Not bad.
During the weekend in Cincinnati, we watched the news show pictures of our beloved city being swallowed by water. The Nashville Flood of 2010. And unfortunately, most pictures we had to see from Facebook updates because the news somehow didn't see it important enough to show updates on the entire city being under water. Crazy. But, as the new craze says, "We Are Nashville" and we will prevail. We will recover. We embrace each other as one and united we stand and rebuild. Too bad the news won't cover that, it's amazing to see the city lock arms.
And so the floods caused all interstates to shut down. We could not get home. So we waited a day and watched, and were able to come home to a house on a hill. Completely untouched. If our house is under water, then God has broken his promise not to flood the Earth again. Our house sits near the crest of a hill that is half a mile high. I have complained many times (just ask my husband, Jeff) that my kids can't ride bikes b/c of the hill. We can't play baseball in our year...because of our hill. We can't use our backyard...because of our hill. I can't mow the yard...because of our hill.
And after the floods, I sing a new song...praise God for my hill!
During our trip to Cincinnati, Walter started to lose his appetite. We asked if his throat was hurting and he kept saying no. Tomato soup and chocolate milk were just about the only things he would put in his mouth. Monday, a week after we get back from Cincinnati, he still will not swallow easily. We take him in to the doctor and he has mono. We are not exactly sure where he got it, but fortunately it has not taken all his energy away.
We are still under doctor's orders not to do any major physical activity, especially contact activity...because the spleen could rupture.
But, Walter hasn't missed any school, yet. I have let him sleep in and I have taken him in later in the morning. He will miss tomorrow...it's fun run and field day...no sense in wasting a day. We will do math, reading, and Playstation here at the house.
So there is the Johnson update...my legs feel fine, Walter is on the mend, and Nashville...I guess you could say it's on the mend, too.
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Well, I blogged a month or so ago that Carrie tried riding her bike without training wheels. She did a pretty good job, but was still scared and wobbled a bit when she realized what she was doing.
I'm happy, delighted and excited to say that Carrie, on Easter Sunday, decided to be brave. It was all her idea. Off went the training wheels at my parents' house and she was off and riding! On Tuesday, I went to the park to run and the girl did 2 miles on her bike!
I guess it just takes being ready. Practicing is good, but she had to know when she was ready.
Way to go, Carrie!
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Today was a great day.
It was a day to remember.
Walter and I had a good breakfast. He ate while I read through the story of Palm Sunday. He has many questions and I love how God is at work in his little heart already!
Carrie and I went to her preschool post-evaluation conference. She was a good girl and let Mom talk...for the most part. It was encouraging and just confirms over and over that she is in the best preschool program in Nashville (Crievewood Baptist Church.) (If you have followed my blogs, we had a bad experience with another program in the fall and are just so blessed to have found this one!)
Carrie and I then went to Wal-Mart where we had to do some shopping. She was on her best behavior and we spent time looking at things and talking about toys, flowers and she picked out a toy and an outfit. Then we went to a Japanese restaurant. And she was pretty close to perfect. Quite the little lady. She picked up her chopsticks and even tried a crunchy shrimp sushi roll. She fed me my chicken using the chopsticks and we laughed and had fun. We came back to the house and she helped me plant and water the new flowers until Walter came home off the bus.
When Walter came home, he opened his backpack and pulled out his report card. For the boy who has had to work on staying focused, writing slowly and neatly and double checking his work, he had an excellent report card. I was very pleased. And no papers came home that needed to be corrected and returned. And his teacher even commented to me that he was working hard. Go Walter!
So the kids and I cleaned the dining room together. The dining room is more like our classroom right now, and that's okay. And they did it without complaining.
Good golly Miss Molly....Who are these kids and how long are they staying?!?! I ask myself
Dinner? Wonderful.
After dinner Jeff played the Playstation with Walter- a well deserved reward after working so hard and earning such a great report
Carrie and I played dolls and had a sweet time together.
And so today ends and I will remember this day...try to hold this memory on days that are not this great...so I can remember that perhaps another great memorable day is just around the corner... |
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I read an online ad about a Nashville mom/teacher who used trial products and for $4 got whiter than white teeth that look beautiful. So I looked into it.
It took me to a page that you could sign up for a trial...but there is always a catch.
If you don't cancel within 14 days, you are charged for the product.
And I have had experience before with gimmicks like this one. You can call to cancel, but it doesn't always get canceled, and then you have to fight the company.
I did a little research on the product and they are boasting that the main ingredient is hydrogen peroxide.
Then I did more research on how to whiten your teeth by just merely swishing the hydrogen peroxide.
Seems to work, rinsing 2 times a day with hydrogen peroxide, after brushing your teeth.
Seems like a harmless experiment, so I'm going to start...today is day 1 and I'll follow up with some results in a week. |
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We always do stories before bed. I've been reading the Easter story.
What I told him I later then had to go back to correct.
I told him Jesus died, went to hell, and then came back on the third day.
Walter then asked me if Jesus took some souls from hell to heaven with him.
I know there is much debate on this so I decided to do some Biblical research. I searched the scriptures and found nowhere that says Jesus actually descended into hell.
And we do know out of the very mouth of Christ himself, He said, "Today you will be with me in paradise" to the criminal on the other cross. So we do know that Christ ascended into heaven after He died, otherwise He may have said, "Today you will be in paradise...I'll meet you there later"
After much reading, researching I asked my father who then took the question to one of his pastors, and I completely trust his wisdom on the matter:
Some versions of the Apostles’ Creed do not have the phrase “descended into hell.” Jesus descended into the grave, to death. He was not cast into hell. He took hell for us, which is the full wrath of God being separated from God on the cross as he took our sin upon himself. That is the idea behind the phrase he descended into hell.
And so there you have it.
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Today I had an awful feeling...what if someone ran a light and rammed their car into mine as I am driving across an intersection? It scared me, so I looked around and as I was passing an intersection, I was extra careful.
That was on my way to lunch.
After I picked up Carrie from school, an hour and a half later, something peculiar happened.
I had a green light, I was turning left and saw a car driving fast and running a red light. For a second I didn't think the car would stop. The car slammed on its brakes and it ended in the intersection where it missed us. It wasn't so close a miss that it would have scared Carrie. She didn't see it happen, but nevertheless...the car missed us. As I checked my rear view mirror I saw the car now backing up, back into its lane- out of the intersection. I took a deep breath and continued to drive. And the car would have hit my side. Carrie sits behind me...we both could have been hurt.
And I thanked my Lord at knowing that His hand was there to protect us today.
Coincidence that I had that feeling earlier? I don't think so.
And this is not the first time something like this has happened.
It happened to me after dropping Carrie off at school in the fall. I was less than two miles from home and I thought, "What would happen if I got into an accident...who would pick up Carrie if I couldn't make it?..."
And just moments later I was at a red light. I was the only one there. Stopped.
And a car hit me from behind. How this driver didn't see me is completely beyond me, it was a major intersection, noone else around but the maroon minivan.
How is it I had a feeling about being in an accident and it happened.
Coincidence? I don't think so.
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Doing the dishes sometimes can be a time of quiet reflection for me.
In the quiet stillness of the evening, you can hear an occasional cling as a dish brushes another.
As I reflected tonight, I was brought to a place of worship with Creator. I thanked him for making me the way He did. He made no mistakes, He can't. He made the majestic mountains, He made the beautiful streams and rivers, He made the very sun. He didn't need it to bring forth light, but He gave it to us. All of creation testifies to His greatness. And in Genesis God says "It is good." But after man is created, the beautiful, wonderful part of creation God waited until the last moment, His masterpiece...He calls "very good."
Not just, "eh, ...it will do"
no no NO...VERY GOOD.
So how do we see ourselves?
So what about the parts about ourselves we wish we could change?
I have always hated my nose. It was a dark day in middle school the day someone said when I pull my hair back my nose looked "bigger"...not just "big"...."bigger". In other words, my nose was already big.
And after that day, I have always looked at my nose a bit differently.
When I was in college, someone once said I could be a famous singer b/c I had Barbara Streisand's nose. So there you have it. I don't have a small dainty nose. I have a nose that proudly says, "here I am" and with a bump in the middle of it. Much like Abraham Lincoln's nose...and, rightly so...because, after all...I am related to him. Hunt side. I promise. A great great (how many times great?) cousin of mine. Not a small dainty nose.
Okay so back to the point. I have always hated my nose. Which, in fact...is a part of me God Himself created. As well as my smaller-than-I'd-like chest, (but post nursing...well, let's not go into that...)
But my point is that all of me was made to worship Him. And when I embrace all that I am, a wonderfully made piece from the Creator of the universe....I should be immediately awed and respond in thankfulness and worship. The SAME HANDS that made the Alps, the SAME HANDS that formed the very first man...formed me inside my mother. Carefully. Taking every stitch into consideration.
My 6 year old son, Walter and I were reading about eyes, and how the pupil lets light in and the brain interprets the image through messages from the nerves.
I explained to Walter that his left eye will not see to the outside corner. Duane Syndrome. It was the 6th nerve that never developed or was damaged that has caused this.
He then asked me why God would give him an eye that wouldn't work.
Jeff quickly jumped in and added that God gave him two eyes that see, and that there is blessing in that.
And it then led me down the thought path towards my niece. I love her, she is wonderfully made. She can not communicate everything that is going on inside her mind, inside her heart. The autism part of her is a wall, sometimes between her and ...well...everything else. And she is wonderfully made. God made NO mistake there, either.
She is so happy, so very happy. She can be seen sometimes, off playing by herself, singing and taking her stuffed animals and having the brightest smile on her face. And perhaps she sees some things we won't see this side of eternity. Beautiful, wonderful things. Perhaps she isn't playing by herself, maybe there are angels with her that we just can't see.
And so again, there are no mistakes in creation. And so I will praise God for my nose.
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Okay, I'm going to go political here...
so if you swing on the pro choice side, you may just want to stop reading here.
I do NOT want MY taxes to go to pay for an abortion. I believe life starts at conception, and I am horrified that the money I make will go to fund and support ending the precious life. I know people who got pregnant in college, I know people who had abortions b/c it was easier.
Cop out.
Sorry, but cop out.
And I know that most people choose to have abortions b/c they made irresponsible choices and it left them in an inconvenient predicament.
So someone gets drunk and gets pregnant. And they can end a life. No problem.
Someone else gets drunk, gets behind a wheel and ends a life. Big problem.
I realize that there are cases where it's not so cut and dry. Rape.
Someone is already traumatized by rape...ending a life in abortion doesn't make the wound go away.
But nevertheless...even if abortion is legalized...it should not, should NOT be financially supported by the tax payer.
Not matter what. Period.
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Carrie tried Walter's old bike today without training wheels.
She has gone the length of the garage with me holding her backside in the fall, but this was different.
This was the real deal.
We went to the park and I pulled out the old bike. Now, it is missing a pedal, so pedaling with a bar instead of a pedal is trickier.
I walked/jogged beside her with my hand on the back of her seat, ready to hold her when she started to fall.
She has the ability, she did well when she didn't focus on the fear of falling. When she remembered she could fall, she started to panic.
She did a few runs about 15-20 feet without my hand...I was right beside her so when she started to panic and wobble, I put my arms on her handlebars to help her balance the bike.
If she could just believe in herself, and trust the one who knows she is ready to start practicing, she'd be fine.
How difficult it is to try something new, try something with the fear of failing, of falling, of getting hurt.
Getting hurt. That's a big one.
And the good Lord is never far with His arms. Sometimes falling and even getting hurt is necessary for our own personal story.
But if we never get on the bike without the training wheels, we'll never be able to experience the great feeling in accomplishment, we'll never be able to feel the thrill of the true ride.
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